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I've switched journals! If you wish to remain friends and I haven't added or messaged you, yet, add me over at cocosmileyboo :)

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Moving

Now, I am not moving to a new residence. As far as I know, we have an okay arrangement with the current living situation. I hope it remains stable.

No, I'm switching journals. I've had this one for a little over six years and I've been using variations of bakacoconut since I was eleven. It occurred to me during a counseling section that I chose baka to put in my username because I did, in fact, believe I was stupid... it did grow on me for a long time and I grew to know it as my entire identity. Stupid Coconut. I'm not throwing the name Coconut away... just the negative associations I have with it. That and there's a lot of memories with this journal that are best kept in the past. I come back and read things over and over again and I dwell on them... that isn't healthy for me. I need a fresh start, but you all are more than welcome to follow me and we can hopefully rekindle our amazing friendship(s).

You can find me over at cocosmileyboo. Cheers.

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New layout

So I was browsing layouts because I was sick of mine and found a Halloween one I fell IN LOVE with. I know it's not custom, but I don't have time or energy for custom anymore.... not to mention no Photoshop *cries*

Anyway, I have a new batty layout. You should look at it lol.

Lonely

I can't sleep for the life of me and I've been thinking a lot about the past, mostly vandigo. I know a lot of you weren't on my f-list when we were dating but those were some of the happiest times of my life, even if I didn't know it at the time.

Do I wish we were still together? Not really. Do I want her back? No. But I miss her. She really is an amazing woman who deserves all the happiness in the world and I wasn't mentally or emotionally healthy enough to give that to her. Luckily, she has someone that makes her happy now. I'm the lonely one. I just wish I could have what she has. I mean, there's my friend Tom who I'm all but in love with but he lives in England... It could never work. I adore him but I don't know if I could do a long distance relationship again... Especially if I don't know if I could be attracted to him physically or not (lesbian, mind you). I don't know... I'm kind of fucked in the head over him.

What I need to do is meet more people here... But I don't know how. It's not like Twin Falls has any gay bars or anything. And I have no way to Boise for Pride in the summer. I've been going out with my PSR worker and meeting people but I just don't seem to connect with people very well. I think something's wrong with me socially.

Back to the loneliness thing. I just want someone to experience life with. Someone who wants me back and doesn't see me as just another person. I guess I just want to be wanted. And I want someone who gives me butterflies and someone to hug and cuddle and just experience that sort of companionship with.

I feel really stupid.

I think I'm broken.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

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Basic Info Post

Name: Sherri
Age: 22
Astrological Sign: Capricorn
Gender: Female
Orientation: Homosexual
Height: 5'4"
Weight: 300+ pounds

I am:
~A slight Japanophile (I like anime and jrock/jpop)~
~Paranoid schizophrenic and bipolar~
~Activist-in-traning~
~Feminist~
~Barack Obama supporter~
~Flaming liberal~
~Gamer~
~A lover, not a fighter (but I talk about violence a lot)~
~Book and movie enthusiast~
~Music lover~
~Potter-geek~
~Twitard/Twihater~
~Hot-headed, stubborn, and very hard to understand, let alone handle~
~A speaker, not a thinker (I think before I speak)~
~Shy and outgoing~
~Wiccan~
~Random~

I post:
~Emails I receive from Human Rights Campaign~
~Human rights-related articles and websites~
~LGBTQ-related articles and media~
~Links to ThinkGeek and other random sites~
~Pirated media~
~Media in general: videos, music videos, lyrics, etc~
~Creative writing: oems/stories/fan fiction~
~Things going on in real life~
~Rants and raves, some of which make little to no sense~
~Gifs and pictures~
~Random conversations~
~Bitching and fangirling~
~Writer's block responses~
~Memes and surveys~

Le Fic Archive

Okay, so I'm going to be linking to all of my fics (well, what I have so far) here for easier access.

||Drabbles and One-Shots||

~Suicide Butterfly~
Fandom: Dir en Grey
Pairing: Kyo/Shinya
Genre: General fiction(?), angst
Rating: Mature/R for mature concepts.
Warnings: slight AU, I guess. Mentions of male/male relationship. No beta. Mentions of suicide: lots of angst.
Summary: It's been three years... is Kyo ready to move on?
Disclaimer: I bought Kyo and Shinya in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Kyo or Shinya or any other band member of Dir en Grey that may or may not be mentioned in this fic. I make no profit from writing this: I do it purely for enjoyment.

~I Don't Mind~
Fandom: alice nine.
Pairing: Hiroto/Shou (one-sided), Shou/Saga
Genre: General fiction(?)
Rating: PG to be safe (I think I mentioned "dirty thoughts" or something stupid)
Warnings: Male/male relationships... and that's it.
Summary: Hiroto's been harboring secret feelings from his best friend, Shou. Will Shou return them when they are revealed?
Disclaimer: I bought Hiroto, Shou, and Saga in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Hiroto, Shou, Saga or any other band member of alice nine. that may or may not be mentioned in this fic. I make no profit from writing this: I do it purely for enjoyment.
Word Count: 792

~Wings~
Fandom: the GazettE
Pairing: Aoi/Kai (Yuu/Yutaka)
Genre: General fiction(?)
Rating: R/Mature for the ending
Warnings: Male/male relationships... psychological abnormalities, suicide.
Summary: Aoi and Kai have a seemingly random conversation that veers to a tragic ending.
Disclaimer: I bought Aoi and Kai in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Aoi, Kai or any other member of the GazettE that may or may not be mentioned in this fic. I make no profit from writing this: I do it purely for enjoyment.
Word Count: 281

~Hyde's Promise~
Fandom: Gackt, HYDE, L'Arc~en~Ciel
Pairing: Gackt/Hyde
Genre: General fiction(?), fluff
Rating: PG-13 for language and mature concepts
Warnings: Possible OOC-ness, language, mentions of incest, angst.
Summary: A lover's quarrel quickly turns serious as Gackt tries to run away. Upon reading a goodbye letter, Hyde tries to stop Gackt and brings forth the suppressed feelings he has for the younger rockstar that makes him realize how much he really has to lose.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gackt or Hyde, nor do I know them... This story is a work of fiction and should be taken as such.
Word count: 1,770

||Multi-Chaptered||

~DEFECTIVE TRAGEDY~
Fandom: the GazettE
Pairing: Reita/Ruki
Genre: General fiction(?), angst
Rating: Mature/R for foul language and mature subject matter.
Warnings: male/male relationships, angst (LOTS of it), psychological abnormalities (paranoid schizophrenia), mentions of self-harm and suicide attempts, no beta, AU (not set in Japan, either), I may or may not refer to them as Reita and Ruki in the story, may add more as story goes on.
Summary: Takanori Matsumoto had lost hope many years ago when an accident took both his daughter and the use of his legs from him which, in turn, resulted in the loss of his wife. Young Akira Suzuki has always carried the burdens of suffering from paranoid schizophrenia and a troubled past. For the youth, hope had always been naught but a passing dream until he meets the famed author Takanori in a hospital, and then a cemetery, of all places. Striking up an unlikely friendship, the two begin a journey of helping each other with their personal struggles. In the long process, friendship turns to love and soon it all becomes too much to bear for the both of them. Will Takanori and Akira be able to overcome their own personal demons in order to be there for the one they love most?
Disclaimer: I bought Reita and Ruki in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Ruki or Reita or any other celebrity I may mention in this fic (I will make note of who specifically if they come along).
Status: In Progress.
Chapters: 01 - 02 - 03






(Yes, I realize I don't have enough writings to warrant one of these... this saves me the time of formatting one later)

update.

Quick update.

I spent two and a half weeks in the hospital and immediately moved into an assisted living-type home when I was released. There is no internet in said home, but the goal is to get to the point where I can go back to work and live by myself. So I will be back one day and I hope you all will keep me until then, but if you take me off your friends list, I understand. Cheers guys.
Fandom: Gackt, HYDE, L'Arc~en~Ciel
Pairing: Gackt/Hyde
Genre: General fiction(?), fluff
Rating: PG-13 for language and mature concepts
Warnings: Possible OOC-ness, language, mentions of incest, angst.
Summary: A lover's quarrel quickly turns serious as Gackt tries to run away. Upon reading a goodbye letter, Hyde tries to stop Gackt and brings forth the suppressed feelings he has for the younger rockstar that makes him realize how much he really has to lose.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gackt or Hyde, nor do I know them... This story is a work of fiction and should be taken as such.
AN: This was actually written back in 2007, at the end of my senior year in high school. I wrote it for a final project in an English class. I managed to track it down so I could repost it (previously posted under the deleted journal coconutbaka).


Hyde immediately noticed that something was amiss the moment he entered Gackt"s house.Collapse )
Fandom: the GazettE
Pairing: Aoi/Kai (Yuu/Yutaka)
Genre: General fiction(?)
Rating: R/Mature for the ending
Warnings: Male/male relationships... psychological abnormalities, suicide.
Summary: Aoi and Kai have a seemingly random conversation that veers to a tragic ending.
Disclaimer: I bought Aoi and Kai in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Aoi, Kai or any other member of the GazettE that may or may not be mentioned in this fic. I make no profit from writing this: I do it purely for enjoyment.
Word Count: 281

Read more...Collapse )
Fandom: alice nine.
Pairing: Hiroto/Shou (one-sided), Shou/Saga
Genre: General fiction(?)
Rating: PG to be safe (I think I mentioned "dirty thoughts" or something stupid)
Warnings: Male/male relationships... and that's it.
Summary: Hiroto's been harboring secret feelings from his best friend, Shou. Will Shou return them when they are revealed?
Disclaimer: I bought Hiroto, Shou, and Saga in Narnia from the White Witch. I do not own Hiroto, Shou, Saga or any other band member of alice nine. that may or may not be mentioned in this fic. I make no profit from writing this: I do it purely for enjoyment.
Word Count: 792.

Read more...Collapse )

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